If Love Is Painful:-

If Love Is Painful:-

"I am ready for a new relationship", she said. "You may help me with this."

"O.k. Tell me more about your past relationships," I asked her.

"I had some relationships. I deeply loved them. But it never lasted long. http://cashbaba1.pregnant7.hop.clickbank.netI had to leave them. It was just too painful. They had so much baggage of their past," she continued her story.

While she spoke, I could sense the pain. When she had finished, I said:

"Listening to your story, I hear that you speak about great love and deep pain. It seems as if there is a connection. What makes you connect love with so much pain?"http://cashbaba1.pregnant7.hop.clickbabn.net

Silence. Suddenly, she had tears in her eyes. "It's about my parents. Love was painful," she paused and took a breath. "I never saw this connection before. Now, I am ready to release it. I want to connect love with joy." She smiled softly. Now, she was ready to experience love in a different way.

How do you experience love?

Love is a feeling, and your childhood shapes the way how you experience it. If you connect love with positive feelings like joy, you are unlikely to read this post. But what if you connect it with pain or struggle?
It's something you should look at and heal with self-compassion. You can't change the past, but you can create a better future. Take care of this

little child within you that has lived through so much pain in love. Her childhood wasn't easy. She has experienced suffering. Her parents may never have been able to give her the love she needed.
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And you are a beautiful woman now, and you can give her the love she deserves. She won't receive this from anybody else. Only you can give it to her. This way she can stop to look for love in painful places. The more you nurture the relationship with your inner child with compassion, the more you will free yourself from the influences of the past. Why should you change this? I know that you were an innocent child. You didn't deserve to experience love as pain. But you can't change the past. You can only create a better future. Healing isn't obligatory. It's a choice. I walked many years on the painful path until I decided to change. Going a new path is uncomfortable and sometimes frightening. As human beings, we love our comfort zone. We may sometimes even prefer the pain we know instead of trying something new. But before you decide what to do, just consider for a moment:

How would your life change if you were lucky in love? What if love were a source of happiness and joy? Isn't this perspective worth to give it a try?

@women: Are you frustrated in your relationship? Get the FREE eBook "7 Questions to Showhttp://cashbaba1.pregnant7.hop.clickbank.net You if Your Man is the Right Match."

Natalie supports - as a Relationship Mentor - women worldwide to become courageous, compassionate and conscious. Through their collaboration, they are empowered to face their challenges, develop new behaviours and become whole. They avoid the traps from the past and emerge as relationship heroines - happier and stronger women, proud of their scars and ready to meet a great man. to click http://cashbaba1.pregnant7.hop.clickbabn.net










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Do You Make People Up:-

Do You Make People Up?

"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." -Anais Nin

A variation on the above quote might be, "We don't see people as they are - we see them as we want them to be."

I see this over and over with my clients. For example, Jason met a beautiful woman and became infatuated with her.

"Pamela is everything I've ever wanted in a woman - intelligent, open and gorgeous."

"Jason, how long have you known Pamela?"

"We've been dating for over a month."

"This isn't enough time to get to know a person."

"I have a good feeling about her. We are on the same wavelength. We really click."

Three months later Jason broke up with Pamela.

"She's crazy. She gets enraged when she doesn't get what she wants. She's very insecure and needy, constantly needing my attention. And she wanted to quit her job, move in with me and be taken care of."

While Pamela was good at appearing open, Jason was good at making people up. He so wanted Pamela to be who he wanted her to be that he completely ignored many red flags in the first month of their relationship.

Do you make people up, being overly positive to fit your concept of who you want them to be?

Do you ignore the promptings of your inner knowing because you are so attracted to a person?

Do you convince yourself that, because you are so attracted to this person, things will be okay?

If you are an empathic person, easily feeling others' feelings, do you assume that others are also empathic?

I struggled with this for years, making up that others felt and cared about my feelings as I felt and cared about theirs - and then I felt very confused and hurt when others seemed to be uncaring and cavalier about my feelings.

Now I know that I had to make up my parents in order to survive. I had to make up that they were capable of empathy, because if I had understood and accepted that they were incapable of feeling my feelings as I felt theirs, I don't think I could have survived. But because I had learned to make them up, I also made up all the other people in my life, and I ended up being a caretaker for everyone.

It was hard to come into reality about many of the people in my life - the reality that I had drawn in people who wanted my empathy, caring and compassion, but who had none for me. It was only when I started to practice Inner Bonding and focused my empathy, caring and compassion on my own feelings that I was able to stop making people up. As I became more aware of and more trusting of my own feelings, I became able to quickly discern who was capable of empathy and who wasn't.

Today, I no longer make people up. If someone lacks empathy and compassion, then I no longer expect them to care about my feelings. Sometimes a person has so many other wonderful qualities that it's okay with me that they lack empathy and compassion. I don't necessarily push them away just because they lack empathy, but I no longer get hurt by them because I no longer expect their caring or compassion.

• What do you make up about people?

• Do you make up that they are givers when they are really takers?

• Do you make up that they are open when they are closed?

• Do you make up that they are kind when they are often harsh and sarcastic?

• Do you make up that they are financially responsible when they are financial flakes or financial users?

• Do you make up that they will change - stop drinking or taking drugs, get a good job, be caring, become committed to the relationship - and refuse to know that you get what you see?

The more you practice Inner Bonding and learn to give yourself what you need, the easier time you will have being in reality about people.

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?" and "Healing Your Aloneness." She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: www.raghurajcashcode.com hone sessions available.



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how to Save Your Most Valuable Relationship:-

How to Save Your Most Valuable Relationship-

•   Do you have problems in your relationship?

•  Do you really care about it

• Do you want to save it?

•  Most individuals encounter some problem in their relationship at some point of time but if the problem continue unabated, 

• you will need to look at it and try to find an amicable and lasting solution. So how do you save your relationship?

• Relationships are precious and if you are really intent to save it from disaster there are many simple steps that will help you win back the love of your life. Here are some simple tips in how to save your relationship.

• Most relationships start going downhill as we fail to communicate our thoughts and opinions with our loved ones.

•  So first and foremost, you will need to open the channel of communication. It is one of the most effective ways to save a relationship from failing. However do remember to be kind and courteous while you communicate and avoid hurtful remarks and references.
• 
  
• All of us tend to be charming and try to woo the loved one during the initial stages of a relationship but after we get over this phase we tend to take things for granted. 

• Dress well and make the effort to create the magic again in your relationship.

Learn to express your feelings. 

• Everyone admires an individual who is open, frank and honest. There are various ways to compliment and express your admiration for your loved one.

• Keep the excitement alive by surprising each other. For instance you can organize a surprise party for her/his friends or get her/him something they love.

• It is very common to commit mistakes in a relationship. Accept your mistake and apologize genuinely. Most people tend to forgive past mistakes if the apology and repentance is genuine.

• Give each other space and let them do the things they love. Most people tend to interfere a lot in each other's decisions and life in general and this can cause a lot of frustration.

Try and seek help if both of you are keen to save the relationship. 

• You can seek the help of a counselor who will be able to identify the problems and offer simple solutions.

Most of us tend to have hectic lifestyles and do not devote time and attention to the person we love.

•  No relationship can survive if it is not nurtured and cared. It would be advisable to devote some time to things that you loved doing earlier.

• Do not be possessive and jealous as you will only stifle the relationship by displaying such emotions. Build trust and explore new horizons together or as separate individuals.

• Listen to your partner. There are many verbal and non verbal cues that we tend to miss when we do not listen in an attentive manner to what our partner is saying.

These simple tips on how to save your relationship will help you rebuild it and live happily.

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follow and save relation ship to girl friend

follow 7 step That Can Save a Relationship to g.f:-

It's the rare couple that doesn't run into a few bumps in the road. If you recognize ahead of time, though, what those relationship problems might be, you'll have a much better chance of getting past them.Even though every relationship has its ups and downs, successful couples have learned how to manage the bumps and keep their love life going, says marriage and family therapist Mitch Temple, author of The Marriage Turnaround. They hang in there, tackle problems, and learn how to work through the complex issues of everyday life. Many do this by reading self-help books and articles, attending seminars, going to counseling, observing other successful couples, or simply using trial and error.

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there was no way we could capture all of her techniques in the magazine. We can't do it here, either, but at least we can offer you a few more. Make her a Thai footbath. Slice up half a lime and put it in a bowl of warm water. Rest her feet in the water...see more

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Relationship Problem: Communication

All relationship problems stem from poor communication, according to Elaine Fantle Shimberg, author of Blending Families. "You can't communicate while you're checking your BlackBerry, watching TV, or flipping through the sports section," she says.

Problem-solving strategies::-Make an actual appointment with each other, Shimberg says. If you live together, put the cell phones on vibrate, put the kids to bed, and let voicemail voicemail pick up your calls.

If you can't "communicate" without raising your voices, go to a public spot like the library, park, or restaurant where you'd be embarrassed if anyone saw you screaming.

Set up some rules. Try not to interrupt until your partner is through speaking, or ban phrases such as "You always ..." or "You never ...."

Use body language to show you're listening. Don’t doodle, look at your watch, or pick at your nails. Nod so the other person knows you're getting the message, and rephrase if you need to. For instance, say, "What I hear you saying is that you feel as though you have more chores at home, even though we're both working." If you're right, the other can confirm. If what the other person really meant was, "Hey, you're a slob and you create more work for me by having to pick up after you," he or she can say so, but in a nicer way.

Relationship Problem: Sex

Even partners who love each other can be a mismatch, sexually. Mary Jo Fay, author of Please Dear, Not Tonight, says a lack of sexual self-awareness and education worsens these problems. But having sex is one of the last things you should give up, Fay says. "Sex," she says, "brings us closer together, releases hormones that help our bodies both physically and mentally, and keeps the chemistry of a healthy couple healthy."

Problem-solving strategies:

Plan, plan, plan. Fay suggests making an appointment,  but not necessarily at night when everyone is tired. Maybe during the baby's Saturday afternoon nap or a "before-work quickie." Ask friends or family to take the kids every other Friday night for a sleepover. "When sex is on the calendar, it increases your anticipation," Fay says. Changing things up a bit can make sex more fun, too, she says. Why not have sex in the kitchen? Or by the fire? Or standing up in the hallway?

Learn what truly turns you and your partner on by each of you coming up with a personal "Sexy List," suggests California psychotherapist Allison Cohen. Swap the lists and use them to create more scenarios that turn you both on.

If your sexual relationship problems can't be resolved on your own, Fay recommends consulting a qualified sex therapist to help you both address and resolve your issues.read more

Love Quotes Spice Up Your Love Life?

Love Quotes Spice Up Your Love Life?:-

see more this type of image than click love image

Love is one of the strongest emotions that bind one human being to another. When people fall in love,

the happiness of being so close to someone reflects on their faces. Even the toughest of hearts are known to be responsive towards the three magical words that represent the emotion of love. The next stage after confessing your love for each other is to enter into a relationship, isn't it?

Unlike being in love, once you enter a relationship, you have to be proactive to invest the required effort that keeps it going. Love quotes can come in extremely handy when it comes to keep the spark alive in your relationship.

Inspires you!:-

If you have been writing romantic letters for long and are suddenly battling a dearth of inspiration, referring to a few popular love quotes can come across as an excellent remedy to the situation. Just go through a few of them and you are guaranteed to feel more inspired to write a mesmerizing romantic love letter. In fact, you can always pick up a line or two from these quotes when you are writing the love letter.

Taking cue from the experience

Sweet quotes are not about writers penning down random thoughts. On the contrary, most of the love quotes that you read are a result of the author's personal experience with the emotion. So, for those of you who are new to the idea of being in love, these quotes are an excellent guidance on how to proceed properly.

It's a sure-shot formula

Staying away from your beloved may not be a very pleasant feeling. In such situations, sending love quotes to each other makes it easier for the couple to express their feelings. Additionally, the love quote is sure to put a smile on your lover's face making him or her feel more special.

Heal a broken heart

Heart break and heart ache are commonly associated to the emotion of being in love, aren't they?"love quatation image" With sweet quotes, you can heal such hearts and gradually coax them to get back to routine life. People have also used love quotes to inspire others to live a better life, overcome struggles and continue to move forward irrespective of the toughness level of the situation.It works even in a marriage.

People who thought that marriage was the end of a love story are grossly mistaken. Even when you are married, you can use these love quotes to add a little bit of spice to the existing relationship.

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